URLs du Jour—2008-05-05

Happy Cinco de Mayo, amigos! Or, as we say here in Pun Salad Manor: "Lo siento mucho, no hablo español."

  • I'm happy to have been wrong when I extrapolated a sparse crowd at a Thursday night showing of Iron Man to possible nationwide apathy.

    I also groused about the absence of Samuel L. Jackson as Nick Fury, Agent of S.H.I.E.L.D.; it turns out that I made the mistake of cutting out during the credits. I wanted to get home and watch Lost. Pun Salad regrets the error, and it wasn't that great an episode of Lost.

    In related news, the MinuteMan detected a sign of illiteracy in the movie, the sort of thing Stan Lee would not have let slip into a comic book. Excelsior!

  • Doug Bandow quotes a news report, which in turn quotes:
    In 2006, London’s Anglican Bishop John Chartres said flying abroad to vacation is a “symptom of sin” because…
    Wait a minute. A symptom of sin? Where are our bible-thumping standards?

    The Gospel according to John Chartres:

    So when they continued asking him, he lifted up himself, and said unto them, He that is without symptoms of sin among you, let him first cast a stone at her.

    When Jesus had lifted up himself, and saw none but the woman, he said unto her, Woman, where are those thine accusers? hath no man condemned thee?

    She said, No man, Lord. And Jesus said unto her, Neither do I condemn thee: go, and display no more symptoms of sin.

  • Speaking of the Good Book, check out Mark 15:1-5, as translated by the Reverend Jeremiah Wright, Jr.

  • Do you wish you could go to a graduation ceremony where P. J. O'Rourke was the commencement speaker? Me too. (No such luck at UNH this year.) The next best thing is his imaginary speech at the LATimes.
    My generation spoiled everything for you. It has always been the special prerogative of young people to look and act weird and shock grown-ups. But my generation exhausted the Earth's resources of the weird. Weird clothes -- we wore them. Weird beards -- we grew them. Weird words and phrases -- we said them. So, when it came your turn to be original and look and act weird, all you had left was to tattoo your faces and pierce your tongues. Ouch. That must have hurt. I apologize.
    Read the whole thing. Or, if you have any graduating people nearby, read the whole thing to them.

  • A SNL skit waiting to happen: "Hey, come on! Why doesn't anyone want to buy this Fukang meteorite?" (Via Rich Galen.)

  • Yes, the item above contained a vile pun. Those responsible have been sacked.